I can’t find my reading glasses.
How much fibre is in this?
Why did I come in this room?
How spicy is this – spicy or spicy-spicy?
I might have to have gin tonight.
Oh, you know, what’s his name with the nose and the dark hair. You know.
Explain leaf-blowers to me. I miss rakes and brooms.
Where did the summer go?
I’m so hot. Is it hot in here? Tell me it’s not just me.
Why am I awake at 4 AM?
Remember spiral perms?
This is not an ‘Oldies station’. These are CLASSICS. I danced to this in high school.
Which clicker works the mute?
She hasn’t changed a bit.
Is it Thanksgiving already?
I had such a good sleep – I didn’t even get up to pee.
Why are there Christmas trees for sale in August? Just why?
I’m tired of vampires.
I need a foot rub.
Kale? Sure. Remember when romaine was exotic?
Isn’t that YOUNG for a heart attack? He’s only 4 years older than me.
You can’t be old enough to be a grandmother.
It was perfectly good before they improved it.